>>take a listen... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wxBS4wP9z7A
Suzaku wasn't sure of the true meaning of love until he lost it. He had lost his best friend, brother, and lover. When they were together, Suzaku felt safe and whole. When they were apart, he felt vulnerable and scared. He felt as if he was slipping through the cracks of insanity, slowly becoming englufed by it's psychotic waves that threatened to take control. But once he was embraced by Lelouch's loving arms, it all seemed to fade away. The insanity, the vulnerability, everything faded away. He was safe again.
Suzaku wanted horribly to tell Lelouch how he felt, but he chickened out everytime. He wanted to tell him he loved him, but he feared he would run away. He couldn't bare that. So, Suzaku kept it to himself. He kept it to himself for god knows how long, and eventually, he couldn't hold it in any longer. So, he kissed him. Lelouch evidentally kissed back, throwing Suzaku off guard.
Suzaku felt as if he had become a part of Lelouch that day. He rememers his knees giving way and collapsing into Lelouch's strong, but frail arms and gazing up into his violet eyes. The violet's expressioned said it all. He was in love too.
Since then, they had started dating as a couple; two teenage lovers.
That was then.
This was today.
Today was Nunnally's birthday. Suzaku, Kallen, and a few others from school had been invited over for a dinner party. Seemingly in a daze, Suzaku went to the part for Nunnally's sake. Everything was beautiful. The table, with a snow-white table cloth, held all sorts of different assortments of foods. A few people picked at the food and chatted with each other. Kallen distanced herself from the other's, a cold glass of red whine in her pale hand. Nunnally was too young to drink, but she knew Suzaku and Kallen might like to a have a few drinks, so she bought a full glass of red whine. She was always thinking of Suzaku before herself.
Kallen looked up at the groups of chattering people, took a large sip of whine and sighed as she averted her to glossy stare the floor. Suzaku stood at the other end of room, gazing over at Kallen, who now leaned her back up against the wall behind her. He sighed and turned away. Whenever he saw Kallen in a state of nothing, he felt nauscious, as if he was going to throw up at that very moment. He had come to love Kallen very much, and to see her torn apart over the same person as he, pulled at the already aching strings of his heart. He understood what Kallen, and Nunnally must be going through, because he was going through the same exact thing. But no one could ever say "I know how you feel" because they don't know. They weren't the ones who had to stab a sword through the stomach of their best friend...
Suzaku felt something crawl up his throat. His knees quivered, and he bolted through the door, to the bathroom. He threw himself over the sink and allowed himself to explode. His face flushed and turned pale. Beads of sweat formed at his hairline on his forehead and the back of his neck. After a couple more times of stomach contractions, it was over. Suzaku sighed and closed his eyes as he wiped his mouth and nose with a towel. He threw it to the side, falling to the floor.
He can't keep doing this.
This was the 5th time so far. He was beginning to lose a little weight.
Suzaku leaned his head back and rested it against the wall. Everytime he breathed in, the muscles of his stomach ached and his throat burned. Suzaku hates throwing up. Knowing why he felt this way, made him loathe it.
He felt his eyes grow heavy, getting closer to dreamland. He was tired, very tired. He wanted to sleep and he could care less whether he was lying on the bathroom floor or not. He just wanted to sleep. So, he did. his head slumped onto his shoulder as he began to dream the memory.
Suzaku looked at himself in the mirror and shifted his tie to perfection. A smile twitched at his lips. From behind, Lelouch's arms slithered around Suzaku's waist and his chin rested on his shoulder. Lelouch gently kissed Suzaku's neck below his ear.
"Care to be my escort, Suzaku?"
Suzaku blushed and opened his eyes to gaze at the violet through the mirror.
"Of course," he whispered back, smiling.
The two walked hand in hand to the student counsil party. Everyone was there: Kallen, Shirley, Milly, Rivalz, Nunnally, and even Arthur the cat. Suzaku and Lelouch entered the room and walked over to the table where everyone stood. Shirley noticed the two were holding hands and couldn't but stare. Lelouch noticed, but didn't let go. Suzaku blushed a deep crimson, averting his gaze at his feet. Shirley sighed and turned away, starting up a conversation with Milly.
No one knew about the two males' relationship. No one knew about it. But that didn't stop Lelouch's from flawnting it.
The two of them talked with Rivalz and had a few glasses of red whine before they grew tired and decided to spend the rest of the night in Lelouch's room.
Lelouch's grabbed Suzaku's hand, locked the door, and guided him to the bed. He stared into his emerald eyes as he straddled his hips and planted a sweet kiss on his lips.
The emerald boy blushed, but felt a bit bold. He reached up and cupped the violet's face with his slender hands and pulled him into a fiery-passionate kiss. The violet boy gasped as he felt the emerald trace his bottom lip with his tongue, allowing him entrance. Their tongues collided and battled for dominence before the violet's roamed the emerald's warm cavern, claiming all of it as his. The violet wanted to make the emerald his. That was his goal for tonight, and he wasn;t going to fall asleep until he fullfilled that.
So, the violet pulled away from the emerald's lips and attacked his neck, gently nipping with his teeth and drawing circles with his tongue. The emerald sighed and closed his eyes. He loved the sensation of the violet's hot breath blowing against his cold skin. Still continuing to leave bite marks on the emerald's neck, the violet began untying the tie and unbuttoning his shirt. They pulled away from the kiss to slip the shirt off Suzaku's shoulders and throw it to the floor. The violet gazed at the emerald's bare, sculpted chest. War had done this boy good.
The violet made a trail of kissed down to the emerald's collar bone and at his chest. His tongue flicked the pink nipple gently a few times before moving to the other and continuing his trail down to his navel. Suzaku gasped and arched his back as Lelouch's tongue played with his belly button. He knew Suzaku was ticklish there. The violet felt the emerald squirm under him as his tongue continued it's magic. The violet smirked and looked up at him. His breath was beginning to get raspy. Lelouch's gripped the waistband of Suzaku's pants and literally ripped them off his waist.
Before the pants even hit the ground, Lelouch was already heading for Suzaku's boxers. But, Suzaku didn't allow it. He reached out, pushed the violet onto his back and began ripping his clothes off. First his tie and shirt, then his pants and boxers. That made the violet smirk.
He let the emerald back on his back and slipped his boxers off as well.
"Feeling a bit bold tonight, huh," the violet said through his smirk. At that moment, the emerald felt a finger touch his tight entrance. The fingers eased its way into the emerald. He gasped and bit his bottom lip as a second finger was inserted. His back arched and Lelouch noticed Suzaku's large erection as it twitched in readiness. Then, he insterted a third finger. The emerald realised that the violet was attempting to stretch him out a bit so it wouldn't hurt as bad. He was preparing him.
The violet's fingers were going fast, but suddenly stopped. Suzaku had his hands firmly on Lelouch's stomach, panting.
"P-Please...Lulu..." The emerald begged. The violet removed his fingers and stared intently into his lover's eyes.
Suzaku blushed but boldy spoke.
"Make love to me."
With that, Lelouch positioned at the emerald's entrance and thrusted in.
The emerald threw his head back and moaned an ecstasy-filled moan. The violet's eyes were scrunched closed as he bit his bottom lip.
"Fuck, Suzaku," Lelouch grunted, feeling how tight his lover was. It was almost as if his abdomen had caught fire. It was an amazing feeling. He was definitely tighter than C.C. had been. So now, all the moves, positions and techniques he had tried during his love making with the Witch, he used on the Knight; and the Knight was loving it more then ever. The Warlock loves it too.
It never felt this way with the girl. It was different with Suzaku. Different meaning good.
The violet's thrusting was now faster and harder.
The two males were moaning and grunted into each other's ears, turning each other on even more. The violet felt himself about to explode, and he could tell the emerald was too.
So, with one last hard thrust, he released his hot seed into his lover, grunted out his name.
Seconds later, he felt warm liquid hit his cold stomach. Suzaku had released too, almost screaming out the violet's name into his ear.
Lelouch slumped next to Suzaku, wrapped the covers around them and rested an arm around the emerald's waist, pulling him close to his chest.
The violet stroked the emerald's hair gently, wiping it away from his sweaty forehead.
His eyes were tired. He could barely see Lelouch anymore, but smiled anyway.
"Wherr didyou learn ssall that?" Suzaku asked, his words severally slurred.
"I guess, I'm just that talented," Lelouch joked, realising Suzaku had finally fallen asleep in his arms. The violet soon followed his emerald lover.
Suzaku slowly opened his eyes, and found himself in his bed, no longer in the bathroom. He tried moving, but felt an arms resting on his waist. Kallen.
He gently lifted her arm and turned to face her in the bed.
She opened her pink-crimson eyes and smiled.
"How are you feeling?" She asked Suzaku.
"Fine, I guess. How did I-" Kallen cut him off.
"I found you passed out in the bathroom. I helped you into your bed so you could sleep."
Suzaku was trully thankful to have a girl like Kallen be by his side during this rough time in their lives. He was trully thankful. So yes, he loved her. He loved her, so he kissed her.
She was taken by surprise, but kissed him back.
"Suzaku, I-" He silenced her with another kiss. He didn't feel like talking. He just wanted to sleep with her in his arms. That's all he wanted tonight.
"Shh," he cooed. "Let's just sleep, ok?"
Kallen, cocked an eyebrow, but complied anyway. She smiled as she snuggled into the brink of Suzaku's neck and shoulder. Suzaku wrapped his arms around her and ran his fingers through her hair until she fell asleep.
Suzaku on the other hand, stayed awake.
